sportc(ass)ters

i hate sportsc(ass)ters

i think theyre idiots

why cant they just do a sportscast

like a normal person

why cant they just read the sports

like they read the news

in a normal voice

instead of reading it like theyre all amped up on

steroids and poppers



'i did not do this sportscast on steroids no sir'



they read it like theyre in a sportsbar w/all their

backslapping buddies pounding back the coors

and after theyve had 7 or 8 'brewskis'

and nipping into the bathroom to drop a hit of x

and smoke a bowl of crystal meth

they then do the sportscast

assholes

all tuned up like

they just saw the game of the year

everyday

yawn



i just wish all these guys

would just shut the fuck up

guess what guys

youre irritating beyond belief

almost as much as the guys who try too hard doing the

weather

like they actually think

they can make it sound

interesting

ratchet down the irritate factor a notch

or ten

and i might not hit the

mute



yeah -like thats going to happen